Man: Hello, I'm Heinrich Von Evil and don't worry I'm not evil but this product is. The Electro Humanitarian Mind Machine- or EHMM for short- is a cheap and easy way to take over the world! It works by transmitting a signal through hundreds of miles of forest in this conveniently hidden location, shown here, where the antennae is disguised as a duffel bag. And to prove this idea is good here are a few testimonies:
Man1: I used the EHMM last week and it convinced the girl I love to marry me-and drop the restraining order.
Man 2:I used it to get a sandwich.
Man 3: I used it to get another EHMM
Man 4+5 (at same time): We're from the government and we used it in our research on potato sauce.
Heinrich: That's right you heard it here, from this German guy with out a German accent and who isn't obviously evil from the name: The EHMM does work. Still not convinced, well maybe our prices will convince you!
VO: That's right, you can have your own EHMM for only 3 easy payments of $567.96 + shipping and handling. I repeat, 3 easy payments of $567.96 + shipping and handling! It's a deal that can't be beat! Buy now while supplies last!
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